Black holes and other thoughts.

Thanks for everything, and I’m sorry. I hope you’re doing well.

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I’m glad to hear that you’ve been reflecting and thinking about how you can move forward. I don’t need someone to be my sculptor. My true, best self isn’t hidden away under rough edges. I want someone who will grow and be curious with me, edges and all. And in that process, we’ll bring out…

Dream as if you’ll live forever. Live as if you’ll die today. – James Dean

There is no such thing as a right rhythm to life. Everyone’s rhythm is different because we’re all unique beings that had unique life experiences. Slight deviation in life will cause chaos, eventually. Life becomes unpredictable after a while. There’s no right or wrong. There’s no single, correct path. Just chaos.

I also wish I didn’t have to lose you to learn all of this. But I think the important lesson for me is to learn from the mistake and become a better person, someone capable of showing others love, emotions, and thoughts. I think subconsciously I knew. Being comfortable with the stability kept me grounded…

I’m sorry that we couldn’t celebrate our fourth year together, too. I have mixed feelings about finally hearing some of the things I had wanted you to say. I wish people didn’t have to lose something to learn something. I don’t think it’s naïve to believe in lasting love in a marriage. I think relationships…

I’ve been reading and listening to the podcasts that you like to listen to. In one of the episodes, they talked about marriage. It opened my mind up about what marriage is and how it should be. You asked me about why I want to get married and what for. I’ve only realized how naive…

Dear Danielle, I wish I could’ve said happy four years anniversary to you in person and celebrated together today. I wish things didn’t have to end this way. I read your letter to me. You have given me 4 years of love, memory, feelings, and emotions. Your smile, your scent, and your touch will always…

Dear Leon, During our past weekend together, I was overwhelmed by the feeling that time is so short. When something is ending, suddenly everything feels so precious. I love your unique resilience and stability. I love how you never see anything as a problem, really. You just figure out a way to move forward without…