Reflection

I also wish I didn’t have to lose you to learn all of this. But I think the important lesson for me is to learn from the mistake and become a better person, someone capable of showing others love, emotions, and thoughts.

I think subconsciously I knew. Being comfortable with the stability kept me grounded and stopped me from growing as a person, and as a partner. This uncomfortable situation enlightened me as I looked back and reflected on our past four years. I understand why you felt stuck.

During the past two weeks, I thought a lot. I realized at some point my curiosity and creatively became dormant. I had stopped living by the quote I love by Albert Einstein “Learn from yesterday, live for today and hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.”. I think I have been able to do the first two things: learn from yesterday and live for today. But at some point, I stopped hoping for the possibility of tomorrow and stopped questioning the unknowns. I realize now that this is important for my own growth and yours as well.

As for how I would be a sculptor. I want to learn to use words as my chisel and to not be afraid of pouring my emotions and feelings to hammer away the rough edges that’s hiding your true, best self inside the rock. I want to learn how to accept vulnerability and question it to share more deep conversations with you. I hope you read my poem, Dawn. It’s my first attempt.

Lastly, may our grandpas rest in peace. I know today is the anniversary of his passing, and I really hope you and your family got some closure this past weekend for coming up. My grandpa’s anniversary is also coming up. I got emotional when I called my grandma and dad on Chinese New Year because it is also the day we celebrate my grandpa’s birthday. It hit me hard when I realized I had one less person to say Chinese New Year greetings to. Happy New Year!